Ladies Conference January 2023 by Jan Jalowiec

The following are links to the audio files of a conference from January 2023. There are three audio files, and below them are the links to the videos that were played during the conference, as well as the informational sheet that was gone over in session 3.  

Im sorry that this first audio file doesn't start until 1:26 but don't know why! Just fast forward to that point I guess! 

Session 1 "Lift Up your Eyes" 

Video for Session 1

 

Im also sorry that the audio recording had a malfunction and this session missed the first half of the recording. Oh Technology how we love you. 

Session 2 "Look on the Field" 

Video for session 2

 

Session 3 Resources and Q&A

Video for session 3

"Manifesto Doc" 

Informational Sheet for Reference

* Proverbs 31 Therapy and Theology Series on YouTube

* “Control Girl” book by Shannon Popkin 

* “The Empowered Wife” book by Laura Doyle Book and Podcast (Episode 161) 

* Leslie Vernic: YouTube and Books. Marriage help, and clarity on Biblical Relationships. 

GOD TRIBE - my personal manifesto! 

G- Generous: Believe people are doing the best they can! 

    *GRATEFUL

O- On The Hook: I don’t make myself the exception

    *On My Own Paper

D- Discreet/Dignified: careful in actions and speech to avoid causing offense or to gain an advantage  

    *DUCT TAPE

T- Tenderhearted: Being Kind and Gentle. Looking for the best in others. Not suspicious! 

    *Take Care of Me/self care 

R- Reliable: Stable, Steady and sincere! 

    *Receive Well

 I- Integrity: Living whole, undivided, honest and with strong moral principles. 

    *”I Hear You” Listening Well=Respect. Doesn’t mean I Agree!  

B- Bordered: Healthy Relational Boundaries 

    *Be Squeaky Clean with Accountability. What was My Part in the Problem? only if 1% me? Be Vulnerable

E- Expectant: Full of Belief knowing God is Working and Moving in your life!  

    *Express needs Not Complaints! 

LEARN WHEN TRIGGERED! 

Ask Myself ::

1. What am I afraid of?
2. Is my fear realistic?
3. Can I actually control the situation?
4. Is it worth losing the intimacy trying to control? 

CORE: 

It needs to be strengthened! 

Committed to truth 

Open to the Holy Spirit 

Responsible and respectful

Empathetic and compassionate 

JADE: things NOT to do 

Justify

Argue

Defend 

Explain 

Six Relationship Skills

°Self Care :: Show Up Whole 

°Restore Respect :: It’s like Oxygen 

°Relinquish control :: Of Others 

°Receive Graciously :: Be Please-able! 

°Be Vulnerable :: Road of Intimacy

°Express Gratitude :: The Power of Words 

Eliminate :: Replace!! Look for the positive you can reinforce or BE instead of the negative Complaining :: Cheerful 

Criticizing :: Compliment 

Comparing :: Content

Correcting :: Charitable 

Condemning :: Compassionate 

This is the outline content that was supplied at the conference. 

Heartland Outline for Ladies conference

Key Passage: John 4:1-38
Key Verse: 35 Say not ye, There are yet four months, and [then] cometh harvest? behold, I say unto you,
Lift up your eyes, and look on the fields; for they are white already to harvest.

Session 1: Lift up your eyes,

The Great Commandment: Introspection
Mat 22:37-38 Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment.

We must first realize we need our sight corrected, uncolored and clear Corrected: SALVATION
Uncolored: Thoughts
Clear: seeing In Light

Session 2 and look on the fields;

The Great Commission: Circumspection
Mat 22:39And the second [is] like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

1 Cor 13:13
Faith Hope (introspection- Inward) greatest is charity (Outward)

Charity bears believes hopes endures... all things

Examples from being in the field

Session 3: 
Some tools to emotionally mature and OBEY the Lord

It is a Great Big World...

As I sit here "laptopping" (... a term coined my 4 year old!) my boys are watching a movie on soccer. It is always so funny how when we see someone who excels in their "field" - literal grass covered or otherwise! - we are somehow inspired to do the same! I begin to think... I would like to play soccer that well! or Football is a great sport! Or even hockey... during a Sabres game, I sometimes wonder, would I actually enjoy playing hockey... could it be so? (The ONLY exception- golf. There is nothing that could inspire me! ) It is a phenomena in my house how depending on the "feel good" sports movie of the month so goes our kids favorite sport! "Facing the Giants" = football, "Miracle" = hockey... you know!

Well, I was having these thoughts while checking my "inbox" , and I got an email from a girl friend telling me about a local man who definitely excels in his sport- mountaineering.

He is a former Rochester Democrat and Chronicle news writer, and after the Lord changed his direction, he now is president of a ministry called "Climbing for Christ"- C4C for short. Take a few minutes and browse the site. It is a very impressive ministry. They climb into remote regions of developing countries and bring the Gospel to those who have not heard the Good News. Who knows when those people might otherwise ever hear! Some of these regions are so remote they are untouched by outside influence. They have mission type climbs, and are certainly worthy of support. Prayer support, if not also financial! (In the "testimonies" section, read about a man who spend 6 days in a Saudi jail... definitely in the refiners fire!)

The reason for my friends email to me though, was the following...Chaos in Kenya. To quote a part of the article- "Kenya has long been one of the most stable and economically developed nations in East Africa, but it has descended into chaos since the election."

She wondered how close this was to where we hope to go. It is one (very large!) country separated to the north east. It is incredible how there can be nothing but a political border separating these countries, and the genocide, tribal wars, political corruption and unrest can be so isolated to the regions where they rage. There is no ocean or great river to keep the trouble "up there"... just border guards with machine guns! That makes me feel a little better... just a little! I heard something a while back that gives me great comfort at news such as this. "Safety is not determined by the absence of danger, but by the presence of God!" So true!

So what is the point of all of this?

It is so easy to live in America and create our own little haven of peace and tranquility. It is possible to remain ignorant of the plight of our fellow man, to dismiss the needs of others, to tend our own four walls and feel like it is enough. But... is it right? As Luke said "For unto whomsoever much is given, of him shall be much required:" And we have been given so much, I know no one who would argue that. We can do something! A little is better than nothing, and do you remember what God did with 5 small loaves and two fishes? I do!

One thing we all are called to do is pray. Intercessory prayer is praying on the behalf of others. At the least we should become aware that we can effectively do that!

And... let the great athletes of the faith be our inspiration! May I expose my children to men and women of God who excelled in their "field"- the mission field! How great would the testimony be of any child that said David Livingstone, Hudson Taylor, David Brainerd or Adoniram Judson were their hero!

Boy, this really should have been written on a Monday! Oh well, remember this for next week!

It is Monday!

Yesterday in church, I was so inspired with many thing on which to post...! I hope you too enjoy the insight the Lord gave to me!

In teens we had a leader give the message instead of the teen pastor, and while the lesson was on lying, a verse in the passage spoke to me more directly than did the overall message.

Ephesians 4:21 If so be that ye have heard him, and have been taught by him, as the truth is in Jesus:


The point was made in a contrast.

"Hearing about him vs. hearing him and Being taught about him vs. taught by him".

That struck me. I have attended a very good church for so long that is is easy to just glean from the preaching and teaching and feel like I am improving without actually hearing God, or being taught by him. Second hand knowledge. As the passage continues,

22 That ye put off concerning the former conversation the old man, which is corrupt according to the deceitful lusts;
23 And be renewed in the spirit of your mind;
24 And that ye put on the new man, which after God is created in righteousness and true holiness.


The result of actually being taught by and hearing from Jesus is a transformed life, which begins with the renewed spirit of the mind. In a previous post I mentioned the weakened state of the mind in the lives of so many Christians. Perhaps only spoon fed Christians. While they know what they need to do to have spiritual victory, it hasn't been practiced. They have been told from the pulpit (of my church)..."Do not believe what I say- search it out for yourself !" and perhaps have not.

This is not to absolve me of the same guilt! I am perhaps the best second hand learner! It is very easy to hear some preaching, to be in a spiritual conversation, to passively listen to a radio broadcast and feel that because I heard the information, know the verses, and could actually teach it to someone else it must mean I have been taught it from Jesus himself and it has been applied so as to transform my mind. While I never read those verses with the same frame of mind as yesterday, I am still accountable for what they say. Though my actions can suggest a transformed mind, only through true trials and testing will the fruit be revealed.

Which brings me to the second message of my Sunday... again by another pastor, and not our regular Pastor G.!

The message was about Abraham and Isaac and the request God made of him to sacrifice him.

After a particular point, my mind began thinking about why we as humans do not shy away from opportunities to test our abilities. In the areas of art contests and spelling bees, soccer games and technological breakthroughs, we say "Bring it" or "Just do it". I wondered why are we so quick to enter a sporting event where our ultimate goal is to show our strength over an opponent.

So why is it... I continued to wonder, that we as Christians shy away from the things that would prove our faith? We too have an opponent, do we not?

Is it because we fear pain?

Tell that to the foot ball player with cracked ribs.

Is it because there is too much emotional investment?

Let the little 6th grader that has ulcers from the stress of a spelling bee convince you otherwise.

Is it because we are afraid of what others might think?

The losers of every major competition still glory in the fact they at least they made it to the finals!

So many questions!

So what is it?! What would make me hope the Lord would not try me? Why wouldn't I want to enter that arena? Why would I not want the refiners fire in my life?

Does anyone really look forward to trials? No, not really.

Does anyone enjoy the thrill of knowing Jesus more? Absolutely!

And the pain of the journey to get there must be worth it. It says in Hebrews how Jesus endured the cross, all of it, for the joy that was set before him. Because we know he really knew what that joy was all about, we should trust that it really is worth anything we might have to endure. "Our light affliction" as Paul says!

So the truth is, I do want the trials. And Lord please help me to be faithful through it all. But first teach me, and let me hear from you!

Draw me nearer, through the fire

I trust my Saviour- to greater goals I aspire!

To know you more, I rest in your care

Try me - grow my faith, and all my weakness bear

For only when I am undone- does your strength show in me

Teach me Lord- Speak to me, I wait for thee on bended knee.

suPRESSion, oPRESSion, dePRESSion

There are so many things that vie for my attention, and it is always a struggle to choose the best over the bad or even the good for that matter. I have recently seen two movies that I feel were well worth the time spent, One was Life if Beautiful, and the other is Amazing Grace.

In Life is beautiful, the story of a man and his family struggling to survive in Nazi Germany unfolds in a touching and sweet way. The father hides his son in the mens barracks under his mattress, and convinces the boy that it is all a game, and they will win a prize if they follow all the rules. It ends tragically with me crying my eyes out thinking how this is one of millions of stories that could have been told. People oppressed because of their blood heritage.

In Amazing Grace, the life of William Wilberforce, disciple of John Newton, is told. As an opposer of slavery, it shows his life's passionate work to end slave trade in England. It details how his tireless pursuit takes a toll on his health, and how his friendships and alliances are tested through it all. In his lifetime, he meets a former slave, and is told the inhuman cruelty he had endured, and Wilberforce becomes even more impassioned. It was two+ hours of emotional reckoning of what humans can do to other humans... an incomprehensible thing for this 21st century American to digest with any real understanding. I tend to shy away from such things as it makes me feel so powerless. History cannot be changed.

This brings me to the title of the post. Human existence is peppered with peoples who feel superior to others, and if given the power exercise that power, do so to exact pain and suffering. Even now in Rwanda, India, China there are "sub class" humans that are looked on as inhuman by their fellow people. Though they won't acknowledge it, people with the same blood heritage running through their veins.

They are pressed in some way. Into slavery, murdered, left to die without care.

Then I think of America- the land of Paxil and Prozac.

We are a people afforded any freedom we choose, and so many choose bondage. The binds of sin that hold one incapable of escape- or so they think.

What about American Christians? I am shocked at how many, friends of mine!- resort to "medical attention" to help deal with their daily struggles. What is going on?! I feel shame in that I felt inadequate on more than one occasion in confronting these friends. I hear over and over "there are some real needs out there that only medication can help...!" WHAT?!?!? Where is the BLOOD in that?! I get so frustrated in my lack of boldness for fear of the unknown. What if they really do have a medical condition? What if they will write me off as a judgmental "better than you" Christian? Should that really matter? I don't know, that is why the struggle!

So back to the title. PRESS is all caps for a reason. We are called to be pressed! It is the press of God that makes us what he wants us to be! The lump of clay that gets pressed, the olive that is pressed for the oil to separate out from the flesh and be burned in the lamp stands! The more it is pressed, the more oil is removed, and the brighter the light can shine... !!! Do not look to mentally escape the press! Christ himself in the Garden... (Gethsemane means press) didn't look forward to the Cross with glee, but knew that on the other side there is joy unspeakable. We are invited to join him in both. The press, and even better the joy.

In my reading today, I kept thinking about how the Christian life, of all things is filled with joy, hope and strength. We have read and know the end of the story! We win, the bad guys lose, and we get to have peace and praise the Lamb who is worthy for the rest of our lives! Now that is something to be happy about!

This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine!

Please encourage me if you see me pressed. And if you see me begin to crumble under the weight, point me to the Blood, to the Cross, to the One who already has won the victory! I might not like it for a while, but I promise I will love you!

Proverbs 27:5 Open rebuke is better than secret love.

The Ultimate Battle Ground

I have been a little busy lately, so pardon the lapse in this regularly stimulating and well maintained blog. Aside from the holidays, nothing new on the north-eastern front except we also had a birthday and a party to go with it, and our normally little puppy is so huge ready to drop her pups any minute! (More to come on that, to be sure!)

For those of you who really want to know though...

I have been re-inspired in my book reading lately. I love to read, but the fluff stuff I have been forced to choose successful at finishing got a little, well, lame. "Why the fluff?" you may ask? Did I mention we have 5 kids? And do you know how impossibly frustrating and draining challenging it is to continue a single thought let alone a plot line in a book or spiritual principle for more than a moment without complete distraction or interrupttion?! Well, as they are getting older I feel less guilty about explaining to them the necessity of mommy having a little "away from YOU!" time. They have seen the benefits as well, and have of late even suggested it. "Mom... you NEED to read... RIGHT?!?!" Should I be happy or a little worried at their consideration of my quiet time? Hmmmmm?

One of the books I am reading is "The Veritas Project". A pastor's wife on our church staff had cleaned off the book shelves due to the recent move of our church, and this was a rejected selection. That gave me pause, but then I thought if it was in her possession the first place it couldn't be terrible. I am so glad I kept it! If any of you have read Peretti books and liked them, this is right up the same alley. It brings to forefront the spiritual battle we are living in all day, every day, and challenges me to recognize that fact.

My hubby and I were talking about how we are mixed up and think that the spiritual world exists because of the physical, and we get so wrapped up in what we see. The fact is this whole flesh and bone and concrete and dirt are the temporal! If that truth would become part of the every day fabric of my thinking, what I would do differently! God in his amazing power and wisdom and might made me the way he did, and I do not always understand why! It is my flesh, my emotions and feelings, that bungle me up! If I could be a non-emotional, (well, more than I am! Ha!) "intellectual only" being that was ruled completely be logic, my name would be Spock I would follow the Bible and God so much better. It just makes sense to wholly devote ones time, energy and resources into that which is eternal. But... would that be what God wants? A creation that obeys with intellect devoid of any emotion or heart behind it? Obviously not, because I have emotion. (really I do! Please believe me!) Because of emotion I can love, and that really is the meat of the matter. I do what I do- good or bad- because I love. The whole "good dog-bad dog" story. I will feed, nurture, spend time and resources on that which I love.

How did all of this come from reading a book on spiritual warfare? Because I realize much too clearly that I do not love God enough to earnestly pray as I should. My lack of passionate devotion for Christ causes me to be less than faithful in daily Bible reading. I do not take seriously enough the battle for the mind... MY MIND!, that I am engaged in, whether I want to be or not! We have all been spiritually drafted into the "War of the Ages", and we will and are fighting for one side or the other!!!

Let that reality sink in for a while.

Pride goeth before destruction...

Last night I went to a concert at our church sponsored by FLN. It was a fun night because there was food, a lot of my friends, and I was away from home for a while and able to unwind. Originally I wasn't intending to go at all, but a friend wanted to volunteer at the event, and her 3 month old was going to be just a 'lil hindrance to her. Being the great friend that I am, (please don't choke on the sip of coffee you just took!) I sacrificially offered to take her precious bundle for those times she would need to be doing other things, and thought it would be nice to help her out. Then she decided it would be better to be at a missions conference in Florida trying to raise support with her husband for their mission in Italy. Whatever. I guess we all have our priorities!!! :)

Anyhow, I am glad it worked out that I did end up going. Not because I particularly loved the concert... though it was very nice. I would have liked to take home with me a CD of hers, mostly the Christmas one... never can have too many of those! Low (actually NO) cash flow prevented that.

What I did take home with me was something she said between songs. She kept reiterating how she used to seek fame and wanted a secular singing career. She would make a dramatic stop in her body language and emphatically say with a tinge of sarcasm, "I am just glad God has not struck me dead!" We all laughed, but a while later she continued the thought. She said her sin was the same wickedness that got Satan kicked out of Heaven- a prideful desire to get some of God's glory. The only reason she did not receive the same fate was God through Jesus Christ made a plan of redemption.

WHEW! That made me stop in my mental tracks, and think of all the times my pride has put my agenda ahead of Christ. All the times I blew the chance to glorify God instead of talking about what I did to achieve something in my life.

I would like to say I had an alter call moment right there in my nice stadium style seat, but it took me a while to really come to a place of surrender. God really wants to change the fabric of my heart, and still hasn't let me stop thinking of it. Even through math integers and terrestrial biome studies, the Lord continued to press me and ask "Am I the Lord of all? Are you fully surrendered?" My heart says yes, my head says yes, but I just know that my flesh will war with me. I know it is THE battle I must fight to live victoriously in this life, and I know fasting (...!!!...) will play a major role in winning this one. And not just once! Nice time of year for all these thoughts to take root. Yeah, I know!

p.s. The picture is compliments of my daughter... becoming quite the photographer, she is!